When I first set out to pen my little insipid drabble, very few knew about it. Slowly, I started to share with some of my friends and family - and still only some. Not because there is anything to hide. I just really don't think about it unless it comes up in conversation and then it's like: "Blog?" Blog!" "I blog" "Can I read it?" and then the address is forwarded.
Yet, I go back and forth. On one hand, I want lots of people to read but only if they play nice. Feelings hurt, ya'know. And on the other hand, I cringe at some of the things I write when I should just look back at it and shrug: Well, it was the 1960's, times were different, and we were all on drugs.
Luckily, I have always been careful not to say anything hurtful about anyone I know. Because when you walk into a bar and your friend says, "Hey! I've been enjoying your blog!" you panic just a little. Then you frantically go back and make sure nothing hurtful was said about anyone he may know. Then when you consider he is good friends with the Yukkell, well, then you cringe because some of the early shit is out there. Then, you squirm in your stilettos knowing that one of your Guy Pals - who you drink beer and watch sports with (sometimes in camoflauge sneakers) has access to some of your tragically hopeless inner-most thoughts (and fashion fixations, but you had to already know that, huh?).
Then after the paranoia settles, you think it's pretty cool that he is on board because, hello!, it's the Bear. Say hi to the Bear. The Bear is a cuddly little ilk. I mean, he impregnants people by just being in their presence! True story I mean if your idea of "true" is "not really." Sound people are of the mind that it takes two to tango (and cash).
Then it is even doubly good that he is in on Blog when you realize you can capitalize on the sheer comedian that the Bear is and the late-night trouble he gets himself into. His stories involve hospitals, the grocery store, bathrooms, "couples" therapy, oh to name a few. But I'm not spilling the beans, Bear! So perhaps he will oblige me an interview someday. Cause for celebrity. And I think I can hear the Bear chime in with: "It's a celebration!" But maybe he should say it 30 more times in 30 minutes just for nails-down-a-chalkboard effect! Ha!
I know I don't write anymore so maybe this is just for the crickets in the back.